untitled

i took a nap after this morning's trip to pike place. i woke up around 5 pm and decided to eat dinner at a local restaurant close to the hotel. it was around 6 when i finished my dinner, and i didn't want to go back to my hotel so i decided to watch a movie at a local movie theater. i ended up watching "now you see me." that movie would have been a lot lamer if i didn't think mark ruffalo was such a handsome, handsome man. too bad i thought the movie was a little lame.


i've been eating dinner a little early this whole week, usually between 5-6 pm. everywhere i've been, i've noticed that the other people in the restaurant are usually elderly couples. i always get seated close to them, and so i try to listen in and hear what they talk about because i've always been curious to know what old people talk about. this is what i will typically witness: the grandma will rant on about something, and the grandpa will just sit there and eat away, every now and then saying, "mmhmm" or "no, she can't do that to you!" or "yeah, i agree" to reassure the woman he's listening. then when they're done eating, they'll get up and walk slowly towards the exit, and the grandma will always nag the grandpa about his keys or wallet or glasses. and i know they're old, because i can probably finish the entire lord of the rings trilogy by the time they get to the door. man, i can't wait to be old and senile.


as you can probably imagine, spending time alone outside of work can be pretty difficult. if you're not used to it, you'll definitely feel the impact of isolation harder than you would expect, especially if your time alone is longer than just for a meal or even a whole day. friends and family are only a phone call away, but they've got lives too, and it's not always convenient nor practical to spend all day on the phone or on a computer.

fortunately, i'm super introverted, so i like spending time by myself. it gives me a chance to daydream like crazy. some of my favorite memories include only me and marcy (my dog) when i was driving from atlanta back to diamond bar after i finished college. when i daydream, i'll think about anything and everything (including siberian tigers with down syndrome) and before i know it, an hour or two or three will have passed. i'll daydream about math, cartoons, music...all the things i would normally think about on a regular basis, but i get to do it even more! and i like that.

i've also found that time to be useful for thinking through problems or things i don't fully understand. i think there'd be less violence and blind rage in this world if everyone took time to just sit and breathe, and meditate on what makes them so tense. i don't think it's a bad thing to "vent" to close friends about some of the things that might be frustrating, but i've found that most of the time people "vent" just to have others listen and hopefully agree with them and support their reasons for frustration. it only takes a little bit of time to calm down and think things through, and by the end of it, i usually find my mind is much clearer and ready to move forward towards a path of resolution.

i mention this because when i watch old couples eat their dinner, converse with one another, and leave the restaurant, they're really calm and even-tempered. they have a good time talking about things that seem so trivial to me. and i've noticed that they take their time to respond to each other. it could just be that they're old and they can't hear and they just take a million years to open their mouths, but i really think it's because they've learned patience throughout their years of living life, and i want that. i really love it when i'm seated next to old people like that, because i'm watching wisdom and patience play out in a really boring and dull conversation between two dinosaurs. and i know i smile when i listen to them. i'd look like a huge creep if someone were to see me smile while i eat alone sitting next to an elderly couple. but thank goodness i've never made eye contact with anybody who noticed that.

man, i can't wait to be old and senile.